"When a girl has a heart of stone, there's only one way to melt it...just add ice"
This is not just the best quote of all times it's the tag line to the critically acclaimed movie Vanilla Ice Cool as Ice. If you haven't seen this movie you are missing out. The movie was made in the height of Vanilla Ice's fame, circa 1991.You may think that Vanilla Ice wasn't popular long enough to make a movie but you would be wrong. I'm sure the fact that the movie couldn't have taken longer to make than two weeks helps with the time table. I love this movie, it's so bad it's good and it has the best one liners ever like "yo yo Kat, drop that zero and get with the hero" or "lookie lookie lookie in Kat's black bookie". Not only is this a great movie but it also helped Mike and I get together. I love Vanilla Ice Cool as Ice and Mike went to a Vanilla Ice concert so it was the first connection we made (thanks Vanilla).
Last week I turned my love of Vanilla Ice into a fun double date. Actually I can't take the credit it was my cousin Pearl's idea. She called me a few weeks ago and suggested we have a Vanilla Ice viewing double date and of course I jumped all over that idea. So last week Pearl and her husband Mat and Mike and I got together to PARTY. I had to bring a VCR to watch the movie because it's only available on VHS (I actually own the movie) but it was worth it.
We made homemade vanilla ice cream (get it? hmmm?)
We ate ice cream, popped (or should I say burned) popcorn.
Then watched the movie, all in all it was a fun evening.
I like doing double dates, it adds interest to our lives, so if anyone is interested in a fun filled evening at a nursing home let me know. Trust me, you don't know fun until you hang with Mike and me.
I could leave the post like this but there was so much more that happened that day. To start off my wedding day turned from a day I was looking forward to to a day I was dreading. I didn't know how I was going to handle the reality of that day, but soon the day was upon me. There was both good and bad about the day,it was full of contrasts between expectations and reality.
Expectation:
Prior to our wedding Mike and I would go to the courthouse to get a marriage license.
Reality:
The day before my wedding day Lauri and I went to the Court House so that she could become Michael's ward. She had to have a lawyer and so did Mike but for some reason Lauri had to pay for both (go figure). The lawyer presented to the judge that Michael was a completely invalid and that the only thing he could do was open one eye. I was about to object because Michael could open both eyes but I decided to keep my mouth shut. Mikes lawyer didn't object and the next thing you know Lauri took control over Michael's life.
Expectation:
A wedding breakfast with family and friends.
Reality:
A not getting married breakfast with family and friends. My mother and sisters organized special events for me to help me through the day They started by inviting close friends and family over to my place for a fantastic breakfast. It was very good and I enjoyed all the support. My mom cooks a mean breakfast so it was perfect.
Expectation:
Michael and I would go to the Salt Lake Temple and be sealed together for time and eternity
Reality:
I went to the hospital to spend the day with Michael.
Expectation:
There would be a big party to celebrate our wedding with those I love the most.
Reality:
My sisters, mother, sister-in-laws, and some cousins banded together to give my bedroom a much needed makeover. They all chipped in and went shopping together to renovate my room. They had a great time picking things out and somehow with all those opinions didn't have a hard time agreeing. They had time to shop and decorate my room with some help from Lauri. This was such a wonderful gesture I really liked my room but I loved that they all had such a good time together doing this for me.
Expectation:
Mike and I would decide where we would live together.
Reality:
On the day I was going to get married we HAD to find a nursing home for Mike to go to. He wasn't able to stay at the hospital anymore and needed a new place to go. The thought of having to send him to a nursing home was overwhelming and Lauri didn't want me to have to deal with it on my wedding day so she went alone to find a place. This was not a pleasant experience for her to say the least but she did it alone for me (what a great future mother-in-law).
Expectation:
Mike and I would drive off to our honeymoon after the reception.
Reality:
On my way home from the hospital I ran over this crazy nail and got a flat tire in the rain.
Expectation:
We would go to some fancy schmancy hotel to spend the night.
Reality:
When I got home my room was redecorated with all the cute things my family had gotten earlier that day. My room was supper cute and I loved it. It was fun having a new room to spend the night in.
So what was good and bad about this day? Well to be honest besides the whole not getting married part, most of the day pretty good (well as good as it could be). Even things that seemed horrible at the time turned out not to be so horrible. Having my family make my "not getting married day" special actually helped me get though it much better than just ignoring the day. Lauri had the worst of it, but I'm sure she will be rewarded in heaven for what she did.
It seems like there should be some great lesson to be learned from all of this and that I would now share it with you. The only thing I can say is that we are stronger than we think we are, and that love and kindness can go a long way. Someday I will have a different wedding day that will be more joyful than this one but it will be filled with just as much love.
As a kid I had a hard time appreciating hymns, they didn't have a cool beat like "Wake me up before you go go" or other equally cool 80's songs and they seemed to go on forever. It wasn't until I was a little more mature (ok basically my mission) before I not only appreciated hymns, but I loved them. It's hard for me to imagine not loving hymns, there is something about singing those simple words that can be so profound and can bring such a sweet spirit and understanding.
After "the accident" it was a very difficult time, everyday I faced a barrage of difficult decisions and situations. Every morning on my way back to the hospital I would try to prep myself for the unknown horrors I was about to face. I would sing to my self a line from Come Come ye Saints hymn #30 "Gird up your loins; fresh courage take. Our God will never us forsake; and soon we'll have this tale to tell. All is well all is well" It would give me courage and help me "gird up my loins" and face whatever needed to be faced (without the context of scriptures this does sound kind of funny but you get my drift).
We would often have the hymns playing in Mike's room which added to the strong spirit already present there. His room truly felt like a sacred space. Often nurses or CNAs would linger in or near his room and comment on how much they liked the music. The hymns were a life line and helped us through some difficult times. Of all the hymns we listened to and sang during this time the one that stands out the most and helped me more than any other is How Firm a Foundation Hymn #85.
My deep love of this particular hymn started in the hospital but grew immensely when we moved to the worst place in the world, the Specialty Hospital (this awful place will get it's own post). A few days after moving there it was general conference and while we were listening to it with Mike the choir sang How Firm a Foundation. It touched us all especially Mike, he really responded to the song he even raised his arm in the air while they sang. After that experience, I started examining the words to that song and what they truly meant. The first three verses are what is normally sang with the last verse thrown in on special occasions and I love what they all say. But as I read the fourth and fifth verse I don't know why we neglect them, they really resonated with me especially the words "deep waters" and "river of sorrows". This song speaks to me at helps me feel my firm foundation in Christ and my tremendous faith in him. Also that the Lord is mindful of us and will never forsake us and that he knows the hard things we face and will sanctify them for our good.
A side note to this hymn; while still in the Specialty Hospital the young woman from my ward came to visit (I was their camp leader) to sing hymns. I requested How Firm a Foundation which they sang beautifully but to my surprise when they finished the obligatory third verse they did not stop, they sang all seven verses. All the other songs that night they had stopped after the first verse or the after the main verses. It was so sweet to hear them sing those touching verses I stared to cry and there wasn't a dry eye as they finished. Thank you 5th ward young woman, you really touched me and Mike that night.
Below is the Tabernacle Choir singing and also all the words to the hymn for your listening and reading pleasure.
1. How firm a foundation, ye Saints of the Lord,
Is laid for
your faith in his excellent word!
What more can he say than to you he hath
said,
Who unto the Savior, who unto the Savior,
Who unto the Savior for
refuge have fled?
2. In ev’ry condition—in sickness, in health,
In poverty’s
vale or abounding in wealth,
At home or abroad, on the land or the sea—
As
thy days may demand, as thy days may demand,
As thy days may demand, so thy
succor shall be.
3. Fear not, I am with thee; oh, be not dismayed,
For I am
thy God and will still give thee aid.
I’ll strengthen thee, help thee, and
cause thee to stand,
Upheld by my righteous, upheld by my
righteous,
Upheld by my righteous, omnipotent hand.
4. When through the deep waters I call thee to go,
The rivers
of sorrow shall not thee o’erflow,
For I will be with thee, thy troubles to
bless,
And sanctify to thee, and sanctify to thee,
And sanctify to thee
thy deepest distress.
5. When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie,
My grace,
all sufficient, shall be thy supply.
The flame shall not hurt thee; I only
design
Thy dross to consume, thy dross to consume,
Thy dross to consume
and thy gold to refine.
6. E’en down to old age, all my people shall prove
My
sov’reign, eternal, unchangeable love;
And then, when gray hair shall their
temples adorn,
Like lambs shall they still, like lambs shall they
still,
Like lambs shall they still in my bosom be borne.
7. The soul that on Jesus hath leaned for repose
I will not,
I cannot, desert to his foes;
That soul, though all hell should endeavor to
shake,
I’ll never, no never, I’ll never, no never,
I’ll never, no never,
no never forsake!
